My son and I were invited to the lake for burgers and fun in the water this weekend. I had to decline. It’s not the first time I had to decline an invite and I’m sure it won’t be the last.
Get togethers are a scary thing for my son. Not knowing the people, the different environment, loud noises, going against his routine, it’s all so overwhelming for him. I have to choose when it’s best to try to attend.
I have to make sure my son is in a good mood, not overwhelmed, not anxious. Most of the time, I’m not sure if we will go until the day of or moments before and it can all change in an instant. This weekend however, with the potential of loud fire works, even with his headphones, it’s not a good idea. So, I kindly had to declined.
It hurts sometimes, to decline an invite. A friend invited me to a house warming last year, had to decline. A summer neighborhood festival, couldn’t go. Birthday parties, sadly, we had a meltdown and canceled last minute. It hurts to not be able to go places just on a whim. Sure, I’d love to get out with him to socialize and I get lonely. I mostly hurt for him. I don’t want him to miss out on things.
Sometimes we are brave and we have a good adventurous outing just the two of us. Sometimes those meltdowns happen once we come home. My goal is to have a successful outing and no stress for him, so we have no meltdown later.
So, to my friends, the ones who are still around, those who don’t see my son and myself any differently, the ones who truly are my friends and haven’t given up on us, thank you. Thank you for being there, for not abandoning us. Thank you for continuing to invite us. Thank you for the messages and the prayers. Thank you for being patient and hoping that one day, we will say yes because we’ve had a major breakthrough. Just thank you. Thank you, thank you.